LXXXVII: Grumpy Giosy

What happens when I get five hours of sleep and wake up to a computer that is on standby mode when I specifically told my mom NOT to turn off the computer or put it on standby? You get a grumpy and weary Giosy. I went to my 6:30am hot yoga class and could not calm my mind. My thoughts were extra judgemental and very snappy...and I was exhibiting a tour de force of hostile attribution bias. Almost every word people said/wrote to me was interpreted negatively and I felt both restlessness and laziness. I was probably more of an ogre today than any other day...and I did not like being a pre-Fiona-and-Donkey Shrek.

Why did I only get five hours of sleep? I took my sweet time last night getting ready for the morning. I went to bed a bit past midnight and woke up at 5:00am. I don't know why it takes me so long to blog sometimes, or, more interestingly, why it takes me so long to decide what to wear the next day. It's not like I will be seen by any men I'm interested in. My office consists of only women. But I have to take into account the weather, which makes me have to choose one of a few pairs of shoes I wear to work; then the shoes will determine the pants. And the temperature will establish if I wear a sweater, etc., etc. It's stupid, I know, especially when I'm not the type of person who shops a lot or is defined by what I wear. (Oh, and then I have to choose my yoga outfit, but that's much easier!)

And why was I mad at my mom about the computer? Only because I was uploading my performance on YouTube and it was going to take 4.5 hours as of 8:30pm last night. And I had specifically told her a few times NOT to turn off the computer or put it on standby as it would mean I would have to start all over again. I did not like waking up to this realization. When I got home I asked her why she put it on standby and she said "I thought you just told me not to turn it off". When my friend Numz tells her parents to do something, she makes them repeat it back to her so that she knows they heard and understood her. I think that from now on I have to adopt her technique.

So I'm not angry anymore, and it wasn't the end of the world to have to re-upload a video -- it's not like I missed a Jeopardy contestant quiz or anything -- but when you're operating on minimal energy and are looking forward to completing something in the wee hours of the morning, and have it not go your way, perhaps you can somewhat tolerate me.

My goal tonight is to get more sleep!